How Joran VanDerSloot Helped Me Cope With My Childs Down Syndrome Diagnosis

Looking back, the hardest part of my daughter's Down Syndrome diagnosis was the reaction of some of the medical professionals. I am not close friends with anyone with family with Down Syndrome, so I have not had a chance to walk with anyone in that. However, my first perceptions were not horrible. I knew that the Williams spent time, money and heartache to get an additional child born with down syndrome, so it could not be that devastating. I knew that other people said they are wonderful children and a blessing to all that know them. I knew that there were associated challenges, but also associated joys. However, there is just something about someone with a PhD kindly offering to help you end the life of your child that really gets your mind going. They are smart people right? Of course, at the time, I was 19 weeks pregnant, so I would have had to travel to another state to have the procedure done. It makes you think it must be pretty horrible to have a child with down syndrome if it was worth all that trouble to make sure they were never born.

I am thankful for all of the parents out there who do have children with down syndrome who have been willing to share the joys and the fact that their lives are not only worth living, but they are GOOD!

Oddly enough, I am thankful for Joran VanDerSloot. He has reminded me that choosing to bring a life into the world is risky. I was so mad that God would give us a child with not only down syndrome, but a heart condition that will require surgery as well. Especially after we went through infertility and a molar pregnancy. Joran reminded me that even if I easily conceived and gave birth to "perfect" children, you never know what tomorrow may bring. They could be hit by a car, they could get cancer as a child or they could be lacking basic human morals and an understanding of right from wrong. I bet that there was no sorrow from the medical professionals when they told Joran's mother that she was going to have a baby. I doubt that anyone suggested aborting him. I can tell you however, that I would be much more devastated to be his mother than to be a mother of a loving child that will never be a rocket scientist and who may take a bit longer to reach milestones.

As for what is so horrible about having a child born with down syndrome, I have not figured that out yet.
My life has indeed changed dramatically since she has been born, but that is much more due to the fact that I have an additional child who requires late night feedings and diaper changes than it has anything to do with her bonus chromosome. The stories I have been told by people who know people with down syndrome who tell me how wonderful they are are much more my experience that the sorrow that the doctor suggested I would feel. I can already not fathom what life would be like without her, nor would I want to find out.